padded weapon wars. For those unfamiliar with the concept, we wrap dowels, axe handles, and big pieces of wood with foam rubber padding and duct tape then we beat the hell out of each other. Itís kind of barbaric, but itís fun. There are no rules; well there are- you try not to really kill a person when you hit them. If you get hit in a lethal area you have to admit it and youíre out of the game. You try not to go for the head shots. Other than that there are no rules besides sportsmanlike conduct.

I got involved in padded weapons through Shawn and Max . One day Shawn said, "Hey, try this out!" and he beat the tar out of me a couple of times. I thought that it was really nifty, so I made my own weapons and went at it. There were about fifteen people at the time who would always do it. We had a kick of a time. Shawn and Max were always the best. Damon was really good also. He was so big and strong, yet he could hunker down behind his shield and be almost impossible to hit.

Weíd split up into teams, run around and hide from each other, jump people and beat the crap out of them. I think Max was the craziest. He was the only person I know who would take on seven or eight people and win. Although Iíve seen Shawn do it when he was cornered, Max was the only person who would actually go out by himself looking for it. I always hid in the bushes hoping no one would find me. When someoneís back was exposed I would charge them.

We were all fighting a free for all battle in the same sandpits where I sometimes took my Volkswagon bug. Max had just mowed through five or six guys, breaking shields and flails and I was the only one left standing. I figured I didnít have much chance taking him in a head to head straight-up battle, so the only place I could think of to go, was to run down this stream which cut through a huge drainage tunnel that burrowed right under an onramp to the I-5 freeway.

The water was about three feet deep at the center of the corrugated pipe, so I walked to one side in the massive shaft. Max was a little winded from his previous battles, so it took him a few minutes to get into the tunnel. I was going to turn and fight him there, but I figured with my luck, I would fall and cut my head on one of the jagged rocks that were liberally strewn through the stream bed. I had a little time, so I forged my way to the opposite end of the tunnel, exited, and climbed to the top of the pipe, where I waited for Max to emerge below me.

As I sat there, the sun beating down on my back, I could hear the splash of his footsteps echoing through the tunnel. I hissed as I saw a puddle of water forming at my feet, slowly growing larger and larger. My weapon and pants were sopping wet, and leaking their contents onto the pipe. Just as I could hear Max reaching the edge of the tunnel I saw the water run to the edge of the pipe and sent three long drips falling below.

This clued Max in to my whereabouts, and he leaped to the side just as I hurled my padded blade at him. It splashed into the stream, greedily sucking up the water. Now I was weaponless and I ran up the hill and vaulted over the rail to the onramp and sprinted across without heeding the oncoming traffic. A line of about six cars came to a screeching halt, and I leaped into the bush at the opposite side of the road, hurtling down an embankment, a twenty foot drop toward the sandpit where we had stashed our extra weapons.

When Max caught up to me I was armed again. I think that I got a leg, but he got me in the arm and then chest, ending my escapade. I wasnít upset that I lost the battle, I was proud that I gave him a challenge that heíll never forget.